Marriage Laboratory’s Best of 2018

Best of Marriage Laboratory 2018

2018 has been an AMAZING year here at Marriage Laboratory. Here are some highlights: We started our podcast, Marriage Theraoke!! We launched our podcast giving therapy to love songs in August, and Rich and I have loved the challenge as well as all the positive feedback you guys have given us- thanks! I finally joined the Instagram party (only 8 years late!) by starting the Marriage Laboratory instagram page. I now spend a lot of time there and this community has made me feel like I people actually read what I write and comment on it! We grew our email… Read More

How to Forge Integrity (and why the strength of your relationship depends on it)

How to Forge Integrity

When I was first married and for years afterward, if you had asked me what a “good spouse” looks like, I would have said, “Someone who puts the needs and wants of their spouse ahead of their own.” Full stop. I left very little room for caveats to that sentiment. Meaning, when I had a need or want that conflicted with my husband’s and I wasn’t giving in, I thought it meant I was just being selfish. That’s not something a “good spouse” would do. My default mode when we would disagree was to give in and get over it.… Read More

Episode 15: Letting Go of the Past (“Last Christmas”) Show Notes

Last Christmas re-write

Whether it’s ruminating on past relationships or romanticizing the past of your current relationship, it can be difficult to let go of the past. Yet, if we are to fully enjoy and appreciate our present relationship as it is right now, letting go is a necessary action. In this Christmas episode, we offer some therapy to the song “Last Christmas” by Wham as we talk about three rules for letting go of past relationships as well as well as two steps to appreciating your relationship and partner as they are RIGHT NOW instead of longing for the past. This poor… Read More

Episode 14: Who’s Responsible for Your Pain? (“Remedy”) Featuring Rachel Neilson

  “But when the pain cuts you deep, When the night keeps you from sleeping, Just look and you will see, That I will be your remedy” So sings Adele in her hit song “Remedy.” This is a beautiful, romantic notion. It is also laden with unhealthy expectations. Can we really be someone else’s remedy? Can we be the solution to someone else’s pain? What happens when we expect someone else to take away our pain? What happens when we expect to be able to take away someone else’s? These are just a few of the questions explored in this… Read More

Integrity: What is It and Why it Will Affect Every Other Aspect of Your Relationship

Integrity in relationships is how you know you are making right decisions and can act confidently even when its hard. Click through to read more.

For most of my marriage, I’ve had this question, that I just COULDN’T puzzle out. It is this: when do I need to bring something up with Rich and when do I just need to let it go? I face this dilemma every Sunday when we hold our weekly marriage check ins. This incident kinda bothered me. Bring it up or let it go? I’m feeling anxious about this- is that because I’m overreacting? We’ve been fighting about this- who is wrong and who is right? Who is blinded and who is speaking truth? I’ve read a lot of marriage… Read More