November Love Experiment Recap: SERVICE

What happens when you do every favor asked of you by your partner for a month? Good things. Good things happen. We just wrapped up our love experiment for the month- asking your spouse what you can do for them each week and then doing every thing asked of you. This challenge is based on Gary Chapman’s book The Five Love Languages, specifically the love language of gifts. Time for a re-cap! If you’ve read any of my past love language challenge recaps, words of affirmation quality time gifts physical touch You might notice a pattern that these experiments are… Read More

46 Loving Acts Guaranteed to Turn Your Partner’s Frown Upside Down

The topic of the month is service here at Marriage Laboratory, and the challenge of the month is to ask your spouse what loving acts you can do for them each week and then do it. But what if your spouse (like mine) can’t think of anything? Or says something like, “Maybe keep the door closed when you’re going to the bathroom?” (. . .happened to a . . . friend of mine . . . .) Or what if your spouse had a hard week and you’re just looking for a way to make them smile again? Then why… Read More

Three Ways to Make Gratitude a Regular Practice in Your Marriage

“It is not joy that makes us grateful. It is gratitude that makes us joyful.” – David Steindl-Rast I fully believe that quote. We often think that we have to WAIT to be grateful until life is good, but it’s actually gratitude that makes life good. Time and time again researchers have found that people who report consistent happiness and life satisfaction are the most grateful. I really think its the same in marriage. I think the happiest marriages are the most grateful.  One study asked married couples to keep a daily gratitude journal for each other and at the… Read More

26 Ways to Make Your Spouse Happy

This month is all about service here at Marriage Laboratory and last week I wrote about perhaps the best tip I have for how to serve your spouse and get your marriage out of a rut- focusing all your energy, conversations and interactions with your spouse on making them HAPPY for one week. I call it happy week and it has pulled my marriage and my heart out of many ruts through the years. If you are in need of some more specific ideas, today I wanted to provide you with some dear reader. I’ve done something similar in this… Read More

The Best Way to Get Your Marriage Out of a Rut

When our marriage is in a rut, we’re often blind to any part we may play in said rut. I propose dedicating one week to the task of making your spouse happy. When I first started the blog, I thought, “Ok, I have two good pieces of marriage advice- that’s it . . . This could be a problem.” The first was companionship inventory- or the weekly marriage check in, which became my first real post. And the second, something I call happy week, I haven’t even written about yet! Three years I’ve been sitting on this! That ends today.… Read More