Category Archives: Self improvement

Learn to Embrace Discomfort (a better marriage is waiting on the other side)

When I potty trained our oldest daughter, at first she was all for it. We had watched the potty princess video, we had read the “Once Upon a Potty” book. She understood potty training to be a next step to becoming a big girl (and noted how weirdly animated and excited mommy got about the whole issue) and was pretty stoked to start. via GIPHY She was all about it the first day. M&Ms just for performing a natural bodily function in a pot? Juice and crackers all day long?? Count me in! Then days two and three hit and… Read More

The Ultimate Anxiety-Reducing Tool Kit: All the best books, podcasts and apps for self-soothing

This post contains affiliate links. Perhaps from the title of this post you are thinking I am going to be talking about vacations, pedicures or my favorite cereal. I’m not (but it’s Ohs if you’re wondering). I’m not talking about short-term emotional numbing indulgences that parade themselves around as self-care. Rather, I’m talking about long-term solutions to deal with anxiety in a healthy, productive way. I’m talking about how to form the habit of regulating your anxiety, dealing with negative emotions and showing up as the best and most loving version of yourself despite what stressors life throws at you.… Read More

Are You Controlling Your Reactions or Are Your Reactions Controlling You?

I was listening to this podcast this week, where life coach Jody Moore is coaching a woman who is frustrated with all the demands her husband makes of her. He thrives on order and structure and they devised a family schedule that should provide order and structure- when the kids get home from school, they do their homework, practice their instruments and complete their chores. The family tries to have dinner at the same time every night so they can get the kids in bed on time so everyone is well-rested, well-adjusted and happy. Sounds great. Sounds like a good plan.… Read More

Want to Learn How to Self-Soothe in a Healthy, Productive Way? Try this.

A few weeks ago during our weekly check in, Rich and I got into a disagreement. I was getting frustrated because HE was getting frustrated. He was getting frustrated because I was getting frustrated. And around and around we went. I struggle sometimes since I listen to so many self-help podcasts and read so many books, I have this really awesome, never annoying tendency to think I have the solution to everyone’s problems. Everyone really loves this about me and never finds it imposing at all . . . . Anyway, being the know-it-all that I am, I was trying… Read More

What is the Most Loving Thing You Can Do For Your Spouse? (hint- it’s not flowers)

What is the most loving thing you can do for your spouse according to marriage expert Dr. David Schnarch? Flowers? A foot rub?? Chocolate??? Nope, nope and nope (Better than chocolate?!! It’s gotta be good!) Give up? Ok, Dr. David Scharch (perhaps my very favorite marriage expert) says that the most loving thing we can do for our spouse is to . . . .  LEARN TO REGULATE OUR OWN ANXIETY! Wait a minute you say. Regulate MY OWN anxiety?? Pretty sure that’s my spouse’s job? As it turns out, regulating our anxiety is actually our job, and it is… Read More