6 Resources for Spicing Up Your Marriage in the Bedroom

If we want to spice up our marriage in the bedroom, gaining new information is crucial! Whether its changing damaging mindsets that are holding you back or just getting some new tools and ideas to change things up- knowledge is power!

These are all resources that have helped us.

In a recent post, I mentioned four sex books I’ve read and recommended. I’ve gotten a lot of emails and questions about these, so I thought I’d offer more information on those as well as including a few more resources we’ve found helpful.

Spicing up your marriage in the bedroom. If we want to improve, new information is crucial- check these resources out.

31 Days to Great Sex


Are you sick of me talking about this book yet? I feel like I’ve been talking about it for years, but I really think its just such a short, sweet and great intro to sex books. Do the assignments, do the challenges and your sex life will improve.

Boost Your Libido E-Course

This is a course by the same author of 31 Days to Great Sex, Sheila Wray Gregoire.  There are 10 modules- each with a short video, assignments  and resources. Some of the topics include:

        • Feeling comfortable in your skin
        • Making hormones your friend
        • When it doesn’t feel good
        • Making sex exciting

Also! Normally the course is $39, but for the next week (Oct 6 – Oct 13, 2017) she’s offering 25% of our readers! Just put in the code Marriagelab at checkout- this brings the cost to only $29. Steal of a deal.

Check it out here.

Ultimate Intimacy App

This is a free app for Christian couples to spice things up. One of my favorite features is that in the foreplay game you can choose your comfort level (romance, foreplay, heavy foreplay, hot and heavy) – so helpful!  It also includes over 190 position ideas as well as romantic conversation prompts. Check it out!

Check it out here for Android, and here for Apple products.

Slow Sex

A book by Nicole Daedone.

I want to give this book my full recommendation. I really do. Because it has given us our favorite foreplay tool EVER.   But I certainly can’t say I agree with everything this book promotes because it is all about the physical and neglects the MOST important part of sex: emotional connection with your partner.

I will say that the author doesn’t promote porn or toys or even fantasy- she is ALL about getting in touch with your body and meditation as the primary tools to get the most out of sex.

So I’ll say it is a really helpful book tool-wise, but I don’t agree with her overall sexual philosophies (or language for that matter 😉 ). Still, I’m so glad I read it.

Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships

A book (and separate audio book) by David Schnarch.

Now this book on the other hand comes MUCH closer to resonating with my overall sexual philosophy. He thinks much of sexual therapy completely neglects the two most important tools for a healthy, passionate sex life- emotional maturity and connection with your partner. He holds that society (and sex therapy) focusing SO much on the physical comes at the deep cost of curating mutually satisfying, long-term and passionate sex lives.

Although a fair warning – this book gets really sexy really fast. If that is not your speed- I really recommend his audio book SECRETS of a Passionate Marriage, which is MUCH shorter (only about 2 hours long) and uses less explicit language than the book. So confusing that Passionate Marriage is a book with no audio book and Secrets of a Passionate Marriage is an audio book with no corresponding book.

(I listened to Secrets of a Passionate Marriage first and immediately started recommending it left and right thinking it was a book. Then I finally picked up Passionate Marriage, which is really long and made me blush just from the introduction.)

However, I love both. I’m slowly digesting Passionate Marriage chapter by chapter and have already gotten so much out of it. I always have to have my highlighter and pen at the ready when I read it!

For clarity’s sake- you can get the book Passionate Marriage here:

 

And the audio book Secrets of a Passionate Marriage here:

E-courses for LDS couples

I have taken two of Jennifer Finlayson-Fife’s online courses and am in the middle of my third. I’ve gotten a lot out of all of them.  Get them here.

I reviewed Jennifer Finlayson-Fife’s e-course for LDS women The Art of Desire here. Those ideas have stuck with me for years now. I also took her couples relationship course and reviewed that here, and while this course is not specifically about sex, it is a great foundation for any and every marriage.  Right now I’m in the middle of her couples sexuality course and man, its good!

It took me a while to acclimate myself to her psychological language and vocabulary, but now that I’ve gotten used to it and understand it, I get SO much out of her lectures. I always watch things while I do the dishes and I’ve gotten my keyboard wet several times while listening to her courses because I have to rush to write down the things she just said.

If you are LDS and are struggling with sex, I can’t recommend these resources enough.

 

Alright, those are our favorites- help our readers out by letting us know 1. if you’ve read or used these resources and what you thought and 2. what books and resources have helped you?

What Would Happen if You Had Sex Every Other Day For a Month? (PHYSICAL TOUCH Love Experiment Re-cap)

What would hapen if you had sex every ohter day with your partner? Amazing things! Click through to read all about it.

What happens when you have sex with your spouse every other day for a month?  Good things. Good things happen. This post contains affiliate links. We just wrapped up our love experiment for the month- having sex every other day. This challenge is based on Gary Chapman’s book The Five Love Languages, specifically the physical touch love language. Time for a re-cap! Of all the love experiments we’ve done so far this year (connecting for 10 minutes everyday for quality time, sending a loving text/note everyday for words of affirmation and giving a gift every week for gifts), this one… Read More

YOUR Sex Questions Answered (by a sex therapist) Part I

YOUR sex questions answered (by a sex therapist) | improve your married sex life

In preparation for this post, I asked you what you, my readers, are struggling with regarding sex, and passed those struggles along to Aimee Heffernan. Aimee, who is a licensed couples therapist and sex therapist who lives and works in Washington, was kind enough to answer a number of your questions last year (Part One and Part Two). In preparation for our interview, I sent her a list of your concerns to review. Right away we noticed some themes and will be talking about those themes instead of answering question by question. Desire Discrepancy First up- desire discrepancy.  Here are… Read More

What Has Been the Best Change You’ve Made to Your Sex Life?

Improve Married Sex Life | 13 couples answer the question, "What has been the best change you've made to your sex life?"

In case you’ve missed it- we are talking all about sex this month as part of our physical touch love challenge- to have sex every other day for a month! Last week, I talked all about how our sex life went from ‘meh’ to ‘awesome’ about two years ago. In this post, I asked YOU what the best changes were you’ve made to your sex life, so we are going to learn from all your wisdom this week 🙂 Which is excellent, I have the best readers. Sorry if I didn’t include your response. I read and appreciated each one!… Read More

Improving Sexuality in Marriage- the Why and the How

Improving Sexuality in Marriage | Click through to read how to take your married sex life from meh to awesome

Offering a three step plan to improve sexuality in marriage: read and research about it, make a sex plan, and talk about it a lot! –This post contains affiliate links.– Twice in recent memory I’ve been with a group of my girl friends, all of whom are married,  and the topic of sex came up.  Both times the general consensus seemed to be that they didn’t care much for sex. “Ugh! I don’t care at all about sex.” “I’m so over sex.” “I have no sex drive at all.” Shrug.  This reminded me of an email I received in response… Read More